Far from Home

After three days in Tacna I had officially been out of the country for the longest time in my life. After four weeks I had been away from home for the longest time ever. I booked my ticket last week to return home on April 16 instead of the original date, February 17, and I noticed I am over 4,000 miles away from home. And let me tell you, I feel it.

A lot of things in Tacna have been uncomfortable for me. There have been many physical discomforts, but those are also the most temporary. I am more pensive about emotional and spiritual discomforts.

What’s especially uncomfortable for me is that I have never felt “right” here. When God led me to a different church last July, everything from the fellowship to the new ministry opportunities felt right. I was sure God had led me there, and I had this overwhelming feeling that I was a puzzle piece fitting perfectly with the greater picture.

This entire time in Tacna I haven’t experienced that “yes;” yet I’ve had the constant assurance that God led me here and wants me here for a season.

Not only has God kept me from feeling like I belong in Tacna, but He’s also given me strong desires to return home to:

~my previous commitment with the high school girls at my church

~spend more time with my family

~slow down to glorify Him in a culture that values efficiency at all times

~get more involved in my neighborhood (and use the conversational Spanish I’ll have)

~get a job where I can interact with people and share Christ’s love with everyone on a daily basis

I’m in a state of waiting with excitement, a state I am very familiar with. I was excited to graduate college, but I had to work hard and wait. I was so excited to come to Peru and start an after school program, but I had to finish college and wait. Now that I’m here, I’m not homesick but very excited to return to the States in God’s timing because of what He has put on my heart to work on.

Once again, I feel the distance between where I’m at and the things God has put on my heart to do, and once again I wait and pray. Over the years I’ve tried to develop an attitude of appreciation for each stage of life, for each day, and I am very grateful to wake up every morning in Tacna. I am blessed to be able to hug and kiss so many of God’s children every day. I’m thankful that God has given me a glimpse of what He has for me starting on April 16, but I am definitely thrilled to be here.

It’s a win-win: Every moment is filled with hope in what Christ is doing both today and preparing me for in months to come. All praise and glory to Him forever.

Time and Spanish

After spending a week trying to learn the language, I struggled with the fact that Spanish is not time-efficient. It often takes more than twice as many syllables as it does in English to say anything, but I’ve yet to find a Peruvian in a hurry. People come to drop something off and what would be considered “overstaying your welcome” in American culture is a welcomed visit. Peruvians often arrive and leave later than planned; time is more of a suggestion than a controlling cultural force.

It was so hard for me to stop thinking in terms of time and efficiency. I’ve been raised in a culture which promotes it, and I’ve thrived in school by utilizing good time management skills. As a runner, I’m always trying to compete against the clock—run more miles in less time. I’ve still made a genuine effort to put God’s plans first and be open to His will regardless of my own, but I’ve never been obligated to take my time with everything. I didn’t realize how restless I get when I have to go slowly.

I didn't want to miss out on an opportunity to love someone because I was in a hurry. I asked God for patience as I struggled with adapting to this part of the culture, while also asking God to show me what was in my heart and mind that made it so difficult to slow down. I don’t remember any specific revelation I had, but I’ve grown in God and no longer find it difficult. I appreciate the extra syllables as part of the beauty of the language and culture.

It's a slow and steady process to learn the language, too, but I've actually had trouble sleeping a few nights because I've been so excited about how far I've come. I praise God for the ability to learn a new language and communicate with so many new people!

Me encanta español!