Being Both Stretched and Comforted

God continues to stretch me as I relinquish my ability to plan anything. I can hardly remember anything I’ve done in the past week because I’ve spent most of the time inside—definitely not how I planned my first week in Tacna, but a food bug that hit me and my team has kept us from doing much the past few days. Despite the difficulties, I’ve been able to spend some great time with God and have had the opportunity to praise Him from the bathroom floor…in addition to asking for healing. :)

The family my sister and I were originally supposed to stay with is unable to host us until they have a bathroom built, and those plans have been postponed for at least a few weeks. Steph and I have been staying with Brian, the pastor, and his wife, Chiqui.

This temporary home for the last week has been especially comfortable—I’ve had a cozy bed that I didn’t have to share with anyone; I’ve had access to internet in the house; and I’ve been able to speak English to Brian and Chiqui. I praise God for blessing me with this week of external comfort when I was physically uncomfortable.

Brian and Chiqui have friends and family coming, so we can’t stay in their guest room anymore. For at least a few days Stephanie and I will be sleeping on their couch and floor, and then we’ll be sleeping on the church floor for the next few weeks, possibly for the rest of my stay. There is a group of Chilean missionaries about our age staying in the church for three weeks, and I’m looking forward to getting to know them.

I’ll admit, I’m bummed that I may leave Peru without staying in a fully Peruvian household, but God is good, and He's been in control the whole time. The only real command I’ve heard from Him in regards to this trip is “go,” so any of the plans concerning where I sleep, eat, serve, fellowship, when I come home, are and always have been up to Him.

I’m constantly being stretched, and it is certainly difficult, but I am confidently hopeful that God will provide, comfort, heal, and grow me through everything, using it all to glorify Himself. I have no idea what our wonderfully mysterious God’s plan is, but I know that it’s perfect and I’m still ecstatic to be a part of it!

My Arrival

I’ve arrived safely! Things haven’t exactly gone according to plan—we ran into some unexpected inconveniences, but God has been so wonderful. He’s totally taken care of our health and safety. In fact, I had a swollen tonsil Monday morning and, after praying for God’s healing, it was completely back to normal by Monday night. Praise the Lord!

We had traveled for over twenty-four hours, so when we got on the plane from Lima to Tacna I wasn’t even excited for anything but sleeping; but as soon as we were in the air and I could only see dirt outside my window I was awake and excited—I would be in a whole new world in less than two hours! During our descent to Tacna I saw hundreds of boxes that didn’t look large enough for humans to fit in—they were groups of houses. Welcome, new lifestyle!

Ana, Laura, and I were picked up by my sister and some church members. I was thrilled to finally be there! We all piled into a van, and I was introduced to the Tacnan driving system—all I will say is that, as aggressive as I am when I drive, I wouldn’t feel comfortable driving in Peru...ever. We went straight from the airport to enjoy a delicious meal prepared by Tia Ayda-Lyda, Ana and Laura’s host mother.

I was blown away by the way everyone lives here. Walls, doors, and ceilings are often designated by sheets. It makes for a very beautiful and eclectic home, but also reminds of how blessed I am.

A thousand pictures cannot capture even one view from Tacna. I had looked through Stephanie’s photos many times and was not at all prepared for what I experienced in the first 24 hours. Nevertheless, I will share some pictures with you. These pictures are all taken from the second story of the church, but from three different angles. It basically looks like this EVERYWHERE you look:

I gathered as much sleep as possible throughout the trip, but all of the resting only added up to about 3-4 hours of sleep in 35 hours. I was completely exhausted.

After spending the day in Tacna, meeting and kissing face after face, I was overwhelmed. At the last real event of the night, a welcome party for some other missionaries who arrived the same day, it was all I could do to keep my eyes open. While earlier in the day I could comprehend basic conversations in Spanish, I could no longer understand anything… and it didn’t bother me because I lacked energy to contribute. By the end of the evening I had lost almost all of my enthusiasm for this trip and wanted to go home. I felt trapped.

When we finally arrived at Brian’s home I was shown to my room that Stephanie and I would share for one week. Minutes later I lay in my bed, quietly crying. I was overwhelmed, exhausted, and saw no way out of this situation. Before I fell asleep I remember praying Lord, I know You’ve called me here, and I know it is for Your glory. Please help me glorify You in everything, even if it feels this terrible the whole time.

I slept so well I completely forgot where I was. When I awoke to the sounds of Spanish in the other room, I thought it was gardeners outside my house. Once I opened my eyes I was instantly filled with excitement! I’m in Tacna, Peru! I have surrendered my life to God and have just begun an adventure! I’m sure I’ll struggle again, but God has definitely renewed my body and spirit after an 11 hour sleep. Besides that first night, I have been completely happy here. I love the people and the food, and I’m picking up the language really quickly! I can’t wait to see what else God has for me!

I'm Leaving Today for Tacna, Peru!

I’m so excited to start this trip! I have already been overwhelmed with how much love and support I’ve received in the States and cannot wait to go share that love with others. I am blessed beyond measure.

God’s recently put it on my heart to touch people. As Christians, we are the hands and feet of Christ, and a hand on a shoulder or hug is a fantastic way to allow people to tangibly experience God’s love. This recent call to touch others came in perfect timing because I’m about to be immersed in a very touchy-feely culture.

Today marks the beginning of a new chapter in my life—ministry in Tacna, Peru. I’ve felt the call to abandon my home and all of its comforts for the glory of God. While I’ve spent the last 2 and a half years trying to surrender everything to Christ, I’ve never felt so compelled to give up so much at one time. So far, I am surrendering:

~Family

~Friends

~My bed and blankets

~Language

~Clothes

~Cleanliness

~Temperature comfort

~Pets

~H.S. Girls

~Godly leaders

~My guitar

~Gym

~The ability to run (it’s not culturally acceptable to “go running” in Tacna)

~My new and beautiful laptop

~Personal room and space

~Easy contact with friends at home

~Culture

~Convenient stores

~Beautiful California landscapes

I know that some of these things will be given back to me in some capacity once I’m in Peru, and I may lose the desire to have many of the things on my list, but there are some things that I may miss every day while I’m away. I’m looking forward to experiencing God’s comfort in every situation and “loss” that I feel. Jesus promises in Mark 10:29-30a “Let me assure you that no one has ever given up anything—home, brothers, sisters, mother, father, children, or property—for love of Me and to tell others the Good News, who won’t be given back a hundred times over.” I am confident that this surrender is not in vain, that everything I give up is for God’s glory, and, as a result, I am extremely excited to surrender everything to jump in to Christ’s plan for me.

I am a college graduate!

While I am ecstatic to type those words, I’ve spent some time revisiting the journey which ended with my diploma:

In my collegiate career I’ve gotten my driver’s license, received my first car, lived away from home, learned to play guitar, questioned my religion…and my sanity, forgotten my actual age at school within a crowd of older people, given my life completely to God, lost a best friend, cashed paychecks from my first real job, realized (twice) how quickly money disappears when you aren’t working, read thousands of pages, written hundreds of thousands of words in papers, poems, songs, scripts, short stories, manuals, evaluations, reviews, memos, to-do lists, etc.

I’ve attended four colleges, changed my major five times (it was always related to writing), seen friends my age get married and have kids, sometimes in the reverse order, relied on support of friends, family, and often God alone when I didn’t have anyone else, fallen in love for the first time, suffered and healed from a broken heart, realized how hard it is to find genuine friends—and how precious they are while they last, seen people completely change for good and for bad, laughed until I’ve cried, cried until I couldn’t breathe, ignored great advice, given great advice that was ignored, and most of all, I’ve learned to praise God in every situation and have received His peace and joy through every trial.

After reflecting on the growth that has occurred throughout my college years, I realized that I shouldn’t be surprised. I started taking college classes when I was a timid sixteen-year-old girl and finished as a confident twenty-year-old woman. This confidence didn’t stem from pride in any particular accomplishment, but honestly came from learning who I am and am not—and not only accepting, but embracing, that person. I have found my identity in Christ and appreciate the way He created me. Even as I celebrate earning my B.A. with friends and family, I recognize that none of it would have been possible without God. Every time I wanted to fall apart, He held me together and provided me with the energy and motivation to finish.

I am so thankful for the development that has occurred in the past four years and am excited about the next chapter in my life.